Volume XI
Issue 5
May 2008

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The Globe-Guardian
All Rights Reserved

ISSN: 1525-6316

Significant Other

In today's evermore "politically correct" society, this month's QuestionMan interview subject is frequently found on party invitations to help ensure all relationship bases are covered.

QuestionMan: Don't you find your appellation rather nondescript?
Significant Other: Indeed I do, but that's what I'm all about or, to be more imprecise, what I'm not all about.

QM: OK, I'll bite. What are you talking about?
SO: Well, the more exact the title applied to me by uncertain third parties, the more likely the error. Years ago, way back in the time of the nuclear family, a couple extending an invitation for a social evening could be reasonably confident that a woman could be asked to bring her husband, or vice-versa, without fear of committing a faux pas. That's rarely the case any more.

QM: I see what you're saying, but couldn't people simply be invited to bring their boyfriends or girlfriends?
SO: Oh, no. That simply won't do at all. In the first place, "boy" and "girl" no longer are good fits for persons who are dating well beyond their teen and young adult years. Second, those words are gender-specific, which is an assumption the politically correct can no longer safely make.

QM: All right, how about inviting someone to bring a "guest"?
SO: Well, that would cover the age and sex questions, but it doesn't give the hosts a clear idea of who might be attending. Will this "guest" be a casual acquaintance, a longtime platonic friend, a live-in lover? Not knowing can lead to some awkward situations during dinner conversation.

QM: I give up. It seems that "Significant Other" is the only safe route to take these days.
SO: Not as safe as you might think. In this rapidly expanding world of fetishism and alternative (but politically correct) lifestyles, a "Significant Other" may no longer be a human being. I don't know about you, but playing the role of a pushbroom dressed in latex and leather is too much of a stretch, even for me; although it could serve as a basis for an interesting remake of "Guess Who's Coming to Dinner."

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