The One
Every woman is looking for him. Ally McBeal is obsessed with him. QuestionMan
found him, and here's his story.
QuestionMan: Welcome,"The One." That
seems a little formal. Do you have a nickname?
The One: Well, "The One," is actually short for my full name,
"The One and Only True Love for Me." Further shortening it to "The" or
"One" would render it rather meaningless, don't you think?
Q: Right. I can't help but notice that you are a
man. Does that mean men who are desperately searching for "The One" are out of
luck?
TO: Afraid so. I am essentially a woman's fantasy. Although many "
'90s guys" out there today profess to have adopted the concept, they aren't really
serious. If pressed, a guy will usually admit that he is searching for "Some
One." Depending on how long it's been since his last tryst, he may even confess that
he is looking for "Any One."
Q: Does billing yourself as a "woman's
fantasy" indicate that you don't have any real existence?
TO: I would say that I do exist, although my lifespan in each incarnation
varies significantly. A fantasy is a very difficult thing to sustain. I do my best to meet
expectations of any woman who believes I am "The One" for her. It usually works
for a while, frequently even into matrimony. At some point, however, the illusion nearly
always dies. Ever hear the expression, "You're not the man I married"?
Q: How can you be "The One" and yet
become "The Wrong One" down the line?
TO: I am, by definition, everything a given woman wants me to be --
sensitive, caring, supportive, garbage-removing. Things eventually go awry because a
woman's self-perceived needs change over time. She expects new things from me without
communicating what they are. Ever hear the expression, "If you don't know, I'm not
going to tell you"?
Q: One final question. With every woman in the
world looking for "The One," how can you possibly meet the demand?
TO: To be accurate, not every woman is looking for me. After a few
disillusions, they usually lower their sights and settle for "Some One" they can
unsuccessfully attempt to mold into "The One" for the rest of their lives. As a
fantasy, however, I can simultaneously exist for multiple women. In those rare cases of
conflict, I can always call upon my predecessor for help. Ever hear of "Mr.
Right"?
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